Connection and relationships are our non-stop direct flight to satisfaction and fulfillment. The most important connection and practice we will have with this skill is the relationship we build with ourselves and our Higher Power. Unfortunately we weren’t born with little instruction books titled ‘101 ways to survive with humans’. But it’s more than surviving, its being so committed to ourselves and others that we allow depth. Because we ultimately want the magic. We want this precious journey to be filled to the brim with magic!
No matter how skilled we are at relating to other human beings, we will, at some point, come to a fork in the road. Numerous times with ourselves we get to that pivotal fork in the road where we will either do the uncomfortable thing that will lead us to be happy joyous and free, OR not do the uncomfortable thing and stay the same thus getting the same. When we do not face those uncomfortable moments with our most authentic selves we get lost in our insecurities and fears. What if I fail? What if they reject me?
My biggest lessons have come from failing and rejection; it’s a vital part of the game. I fall – then brush my knees off, ask for help, learn a few new coping skills and keep it moving. The discomfort is the very thing that stimulates my curiosity to research or dig down deep inside. The very pieces that trigger doubt inside of me encourage the work that delivers the magic and let’s face it, life deserves magic. Only when I remember that WE ALL have our old stories that create self-doubt, I am than able to connect to others human to human; With all my ugly and beautiful pieces and I can show up with empathy and hold space for others.
Interestingly enough when I am willing to be authentic and vulnerable it invites that same from my loved ones, and that my beauties, IS intimacy. And when I am able to express the crazy that comes along with my “old story” to the people I love, I am using that old garbage as a building block to connection, not as a barrier. As I mentioned before connection is the highway to fulfillment, and, well, God, really if that’s your jam. When we push through our fears and stand in front of someone in our own, terrified, authenticity we allow others to make space for us. It serves us to share ourselves because we are not only honoring our truth, but we are delightfully inviting others to be authentically present, too.
Dina Filice, PCC